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Bye Bye Birdie ›› Normal American Boy | | Reporter: He's coming! He's coming! Conrad Birdie is coming! Hey Conrad, how about answering a few questions? How do you feel about joining in the Army? Albert: !odps ii! fgdd! Ah Ah Ah, how does he feelYou ask how he feels He's much too shy to tell you, So, I'll tell ya how he feels He feels brave and eager! Strangely humble! Proud to be a plain GI! Rosie: He would gladly face those bullets, For he's not afraid to die! Chorus: For he's a fine, upstanding, patriotic, healthy, normal American boy! Albert: !odps ii! fgdd! And that's why he volunteered for Voice: Volunteered? I thought he was drafted! Voice: And he appealedthree times! Rosie: Sing! Girls: We love you Conrad Oh yes we do We love you Conrad And will be true! When you're not near us We're blue! Oh, Conrad, we love you Albert: !odps ii! fgdd! Very nice! Voice: Say what's the pitch on that Hollywood starlet, Conrad. Are you two engaged? Rosie: Ah AhIs he engaged? Is Conrad engaged? There's absolutely nothing to the rumor he's engaged! Albert: !odps ii! fgdd! She's a real pal, like a sister, but it doesn't mean a thing! And that eighteen carat diamond, it was just a "friendship" ring! Chorus: For he's a fine, upstanding, patriotic, healthy, normal American boy! Reporter: And why was your husband so mad? Albert: !odps ii! fgdd! Sing! Girls: We love you Conrad Oh yes we do We love you Conrad And will be true! Reporter: Hey Mr. Peterson, give us a scoop, is Conrad still drinking a lot? Rosie: Now listen here! This gossip must stop! He goes to church each Sunday and he doesn't touch a drop! Albert: !odps ii! fgdd! He's as decent as a minister! Rosie: Absolutely He's as sober as a judge! He subscribes to ev'ry charity! And his hobby's making fudge! All: For he's a fine upstanding, patriotic, healthy, normal American boy Reporter: Is it true that you found Conrad in a Reform School? Rosie & Albert: That's a lie! A lie thru and thru! I'll tell you where he came from, here's the story and it's true! He was born in Indochina, Albert: !odps ii! fgdd! He was born in old Virginia Rosie: Son of missionaries there! Albert: !odps ii! fgdd! On a thousand acre farm! Rosie: Very poor and very hungry, What a cruel life to bear! Albert: !odps ii! fgdd! From a line of wealthy planters, Full of genteel, southern charm! Rosie: Soon he drifted down to Hong Kong, To a waterfront saloon! Albert: !odps ii! fgdd! In evening by the river, In the moonlight they would croon! Rosie: That is where I heard him singing, Albert: !odps ii! fgdd! That's where Conrad started singing, Rosie: Underneath a Hong Kong moon! Albert: !odps ii! fgdd! 'Neath that sweet plantation moon! All: Teens: Oh Beautiful for spacious skies, We love you, Conrad! Oh, yes we do! For amber waves of grain. We love you, Conrad, and we'll be true. A-A-America America, Oh, oh, Conrad, we love you God shed His grace on thee. We love you, Conrad, and we'll be true. All: For he's a fine upstanding, av'rage, modest, patriotic, healthy, normal American, American boy! | | Normal American Boy Bye Bye Birdie
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